26th Nov 2005 (sat): Marriage Preparation Course Finale
Today is our final session of our Marriage Preparation Course, and I am
glad that today both of us are involved in more couple discussion and
he is more willing to discuss those stuffs with me.
Although a part of the course is to stand up, and imitate your
partner's actions like a mirror image, and amused and silly do we look
like!!
Our results from the FOCUS analysis test came back, and sadly to sad,
there are many indicators that we score below average. Well, mostly is
due to me cuz I put "Uncertain" most of the time instead of "Agree" or
"Disagree". I shld have put in more efforts to do the test. Instead,
dear only chose "Agree" or "Disagree" cuz as he studied Statistics, he
knows should not choose "Uncertain" lor.
I learnt an important message in this course and it is:
"True love is not just a feeling, but it is an ongoing decision to act in a loving way"When a couple passes the "infatuation period", estimated 6 months to 2 years of the marriage, it will proceed into the "Post-Rapture"
stage whereby you may feel the intense love/ the romance is dying/not
strong enough/non-existant at some times (which is quite common). Don't
worry too much,as this is the beginning of true love, not the death of
romance. As the relationship matured, there is a need to be "intentional" in the interpretation of your loving actions. That is how you will keep the romance alive.
What the counsellor advice is....
1) To have more couple time
2) To celebrate important dates/occasions
3) To have common hobbies
4) Resolve conflicts as they arise
5) To communicate with each other more.
At the end of the session, the guys were asked to go outside, while the
counsellor asks the girlfriends to write some notes of appreciation on
the cards that she had prepared, together with chocs, to give to our
boyfriends later. Similarly she asks the guys to write something nice
to us, and to give us a stalk of rose each. Silly dear looks so cute
with his single stalk of rose, but most importantly is the words that
he had wrote for me...I am glad that we did went through this marriage
preparation course together, and finally he accepted it willingly.
I strongly encourage my friends who are intending to get married, and
who may be unsure of how to get yourself prepared for this challenging
path, to take up this course...This course allows both of you to discuss topics that may be too
sensitive for both of you to bring up, and allows room for discussion.
25th Nov 2005 (fri): Proud Owners of a HDB Flat!
This date is very critical to us, as we have an appointment with the
HDB for the walk-in-selection of flats...After serious discussion with
each other, and his parents, and after viewing the area, after talking
to one of the residents living there, we have decided to take up the
flat at Klang Lane (aka Little India area).
Probably people may have comments like "Huh? Little India ah? Safe or
not?" etc, we also do have such concerns too...However after much
thinking and discussion, we came to a final conclustion is that, most
importantly, we must like the flat (layout, floor level, direction of
the door), then other important factors like "Area (Town preferred), living near parents (Yes), convenience to amenities/ work place, MRT stations/ busstops (Yessssss)"
are also within our consideration as well. Thus despite we may have
some concerns regarding my safety, and our children's safety when going
home alone at night, we do come up with some possible solutions.
Therefore, a problem is no longer a problem, when there are solutions!
isn't it? Moreover, his parents are very encouraging towards our choice
this time and finally can rest their hearts assured liao.
Its only the financial burden that I was unprepared for, and suddenly
felt very stressed that many things will change after we have made so
many big arrangements - Housing, Renovation, Banquet, Bridal Gowns,
Honeymoon, etc... I cried when I saw an advertisement showing
beautiful homes, with their beautiful interior designing,,,cuz it is a
big decision that we have made, and it is also a wonderful decision, as
we are both moving another step closer to our goal and dream...I feel
wonderful yet worried...My money pouch has to be tightened liao...
Gladly to have Dear's assurance and support..he say "dun worry, you
still have me, i will help you solve the problems, dun worry too
much..." I feel even more touched...He is the man of my life, of my
heart...
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After the marriage preparation course, we went for a nice dinner at Sun
Plaza, for the famous Wanton Mee, recommended by Dear. Then we went to
the TCC cafe at NAFA Building as it is quiet and cosy... We sit on the
big cushions, reading through our HDB notes, and also discussing the
design layout of our future home...Hee...We can finally put our
discussion into reality liao..The last time we discuss are just vague
ideas, cuz not yet realised mah...Finally...it's so wonderful... I hope our marriage will be a fulfilling one...
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