Kayla's 2012 (Jan)

• January 2012

- Kayla started her nursery school at Foochow Methodist Church School on 3 January 2012. Initially we were quite worried that she may cry/could not bear to leave us etc (all kinds of stories that we have heard from others) but her performance surprised us! She was excited and happy to go to school, and there were no teary goodbyes. We were very relieved of that results, and proud of our girl! She even went to kpo-ed about other kid who was crying. She never fail to leave up to her "Ms KPO" name. haha.

Activities in school

We are happy that she seems to like the teacher, & going to the school! But only 4th day in school she already caught the common flu bug from school. Haiz.. We hope she will get stronger amidst the common school bug infection...

*Happy Dragon Lunar New Year!*

This year's Lunar New Year is earlier than past years and happens in January. Kayla had lotsa fun going around visiting with her cousins and collecting ang pows.

Achievements @ 30 months!

Potty-training

- When it started?: Bought her the potty at 18 months old, but procrastinated and started aimlessly around when she was 2 years old (My own targeted training for her) but she wasn't really ready then as she didn't know how to tell us, and many times reluctantly sit on the potty.

Re-started potty training for her when at 30 months old when she is able to articulate better and understand us better. Initially she sat very long on the potty while engaging in other activities such as reading, watching tv, without any results. Felt so stressed up worrying she will leak without telling us to go pass urine, worrying that she might have problems after not passing urine for 3-4 hours.

-Method deployed: I let her wear Bum wear the training pants during the day time, then every half an hour ask if she wans to pass urine/bring her to sit potty. So every morning very Bo eng & stressed. Eventually when she knows when to tell us that she wants to pass urine, then I loosen up and so long I keep reminding her, I need not keep bringing her to potty since she dun urine tt frequent.

- Support training in school & caregiver's plc: Upon advice by an experienced colleague who is a mother herself, I have roped in both the school teacher & my in laws to help me potty train her. Both sides have been very supportive & the school side shows more positive results. Kayla is able to tell teacher if she wants to pass urine (teacher asked her to remove diaper in school) and able to use the children's toilet. In comparison, Kayla refused to use the baby toilet seat in my in laws' place & can don't pass urine for 5 hours & kept resisting to go into toilet! She can even stay dry till she reaches home to pass urine in the potty. That's when we realized that she prefers to use the potty to using the toilet!

- 1st successful wee-wee in the potty: Happened on 30 Jan 2012. She did not pass urine for almost 3 hours that day & when the urge came, she ran out from her room jumping up & down! Then she says she wants ssh ssh. Sat her down on the potty, nothing.  Wore the training pants on her & she went back to thr room. Next minute she's out again. Sat her down again & she started to exert a bit, shaked her body, that Hola! Her urine started to come out! After she has finished, she looked at her urine & exclaimed," why my ssh ssh looks like orange juice?" Lol!!! (ever since then whenever she pass urine in her potty, she refers that to orange juice!) That important day marks a very major milestone that both she & I have achieved so far! To me, potty training seems to be the hardest training that I have to carry out! I have trained her on self-feeding, self-drinking etc, all not as tough as this! So naturally I was very excited at her first successful attempt! She was also elated & happy when we kept praising her! Subsequently she has a few more successful times on the potty, but sometimes yet refusing to cooperate.

- Next steps: Once she has familiarized and settle down on passing urine in potty/toilet bowl, then have train her to poo poo in potty/toilet bowl. Extremely hard as she likes to poo in her diapers while standing up, and forbids anyone to go near her! See how la, one step at a time. Then lastly would be Night time training...

Drinking from cup
Finally able to hold her cup steadily as she drinks from the cup! Another achievement!

Her Likes

Jigsaw puzzling Time!

I Love my Girl!

My pretty girl

Looking back...My 2011

My 2011, has been really accomplishing, I should say!

• Took up a 1.5 years gym membership with California Fitness in July 2010, and it's expiring soon in Jan 2012! I've gradually increased my gym attendance from once a week (sometimes grudgingly and trying to pyscho myself out from going gym) till twice a week (and loving every moments of going to gym, and feeling out of odds and fat whenever I skipped a week!) The exercising makes me feels good! And I especially like the body combat class! Really shiok! But I will not be renewing my gym membership yet. Shall focus my priorities elsewhere next year.. But hope I won't grow fat once I stop exercising!
• Took part in JP Morgan Chase Corporate Run with my office buddy!
• Re-freshed my driving lessons under the personal coaching of the husb. Not too bad. But gradually I have stopped being enthu and started getting lazy... Opps! I wonder when can my resolution of "Be a confident and regular driver" will be realised?
• Our mother-and-daughter bond has become stronger this year when Kayla started to grow more attached to me. I feel more sense of "mother-satisfaction" as this bond grows stronger My efforts have finally started to pay off!

Other than feeling more accomplished, my life is 2011 was also pretty enjoyable!

• Caught 3 musicals/theatre shows in a year!
  

(Lion King was for my birthday treat, and Wicked was a couple date with husb. Beauty King was a "ogling-at-stripping-muscle-men" date with friends from office Heehee...)

• Went Japan and Gold Coast for the first time!

1. Japan-Tokyo: I always dreamed of going to Japan, and our wish came true in March 2011! We took a 10 Days 9 Nights F&E tour in Tokyo and had luckily escaped from a massive tsunami and earthquake that happened on the day we returned to Singapore. It's a nanrrow escape for us, and fortunate blessings for the 3 of us. We had enjoyed ourselves during this trip in Tokyo & Disneyland too.
   
2. Gold Coast: It's our second time to Australia, but our first in Gold Coast, and our first full self-drive trip. Still prefer Japan. haha.
   

• Couple dates!

Our husb-and-wife relationship has gradually improved towards the lower half of the year as we grow more loving, established more communication, maintained more patience with each other. And of cuz' the couple dates help! Regardless lunch/dinner dates, movie/musical dates, it's all about spending time with each other. There are more hugs and kisses, more TLC given. I realise the underlying rule is "The more you give to each other, the more it gets returned" I look forward to a more harmonious and loving relationship with the husb in the many more years to come!

Oh! Next year is our 十年 together-ness! My goodness! How fast time can pass... Feel so old with each other... But I've glad that with this 10 years, he is now my family, someone who will always stand by me with no strings attached.

To a brand new Year 2012 whereby I will be turning 30 years old, I hope I will:

• Spend more quality time with my own family, and my close friends
• Continue giving TLC and patience to my husb and daughter, and be a dutiful and good wife and mother to them.
  
• Staying healthy and FIT (if possible!)
• Bring Kayla more for outdoor and healthy activities instead of always going gai-gai in shopping centres
• 成功做人！
  

Kayla: After 2 years old...

My talkative girl whose language skills have developed leaps and bounds after turning 2 years old, have become so much fun to chat with! She can imitate to us what interesting words her cousins have said, she can reiterate what we have said to her. Her mandarin has also improved greatly and can speak complete sentences in Mandarin. Well, she even know how to switch between English and Mandarin when she speaks to the maid vs us! haha.

Amazingly I came to know that she actually has quite good memory of past happenings! One fine day she suddenly brought up Klaske and what she did - something that happened about 2 months back! Haha!

Happenings after 2 years old!:

• Visit to Singapore Art Museum

• Visit Walter the Rabbit @ Marina Bay
  

• Wanting to do more activities by herself (e.g. taking off shoes, socks, switching on/off the TV)
  

• Activity time @ playground

• New games! 

         - Matching a pair
                            - Memory game

          - Able to identify a few alphabets such as A, M, Q, S, T and numbers such as 1, 5, 6, 0

         - Grasp the concept of difference in size, e.g Papa bigger

         - Engage in empathizing role-play (she being the doc after having a jab to us, will     hug & comfort us when we "cry")

        - Express her emotions in words (I m unhappy, it's fun! etc)

• Talk about "dollars" and "cents'!
• Funny self-conversations:
  

         Kayla: "Papa says - What do you want?"
         Kayla: "Mama says - Stop it!"
         Kayla: " Yeye says - zo man ye?"
         Kayla: "Nai nai says - mei nu" (i.e. pretty girl)
         Kayla: "Ah ma says - you mei you?"

         (Hahahaha....)

• Her own created (funny) way of saying Good-byes!:

         1. "Bye Little Tomato!" & her reply is "Bye Bye Little Carrot!"

         2. "Bye Little Yakult!" & her reply is "Bye Bye little Yogurt!"

         3. "Bye Bye car!" & her reply is "Bye bye motorbike!"

         4. "Bye little Dora!" & her reply is "Bye bye Monkey!" 

         5. "Bye little Kai Lan!" & her reply is "Bye bye Ye Ye!"

• More Toddler tantrums (as she wants to exert more independence and individualism)

      - Refused to do what we wanted her to do yet she doesn't wish to do, by
      (1) ignoring us,
      (2) put up a big struggle when we try to carry her
      (3) Cry and run away!

     - Talking back in a tone similar to ours when we scold her

• New enrichment classes!

1. Kinderdance: Kindertots

- Initially she seemed a bit keen on learning new dance steps from Kindertots, but gradually I realised that during the 30 min class, she is only focused on the first 10-15 mins then she got distracted and tired. She also didn't follow the dance steps earnestly. Luckily this is a trial class that I have signed up for her, mainly for her exposure purpose. So I didn't continue her with the dance class after that.
 
     2.  Leapschool House: Whiz Creators
- In comparison, Kayla adjusted to Leapschool House class faster and better! She likes the dancing and singing, and towards the end of the 8 lessons, she started to participate more and even joined in the dancing and shaking! As a clumsy inactive girl, she was finding a bit difficult to climb up and down as easily as the other toddlers. She started to like the gym play session more and more, and got more confident during all the climbing and active play. Thumbs up for the improvement! She also got exposed to art and craft sessions whereby she can learn to use the scissors, the glue, the paint brush. Kayla also enjoyed both the English and Chinese storytelling sessions. I think this Leapschool House class is really beneficial to her learning development.

• Live shows!

1. Elmo Green Thumb

     2.  Mickey Mouse Live Show
- She enjoyed both the shows more or less, but just tend to get tired toward the later half of the shows. In comparison she knows more characters from the Mickey Mouse live show than the Elmo Green Thumb live show, so can relate better to the latter.

Facebook & Friends

From Wikipedia:

• Facebook is a social networking service and website launched in February 2004, operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc.^[1] As of July 2011, Facebook has more than 750 million active users.^[6][7] Users may create a personal profile, add other users as friends, and exchange messages, including automatic notifications when they update their profile.

• Friend(ship) is a form of interpersonal relationship generally considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations.

  Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:

• The tendency to desire what is best for the other
• Sympathy and empathy
• Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart
• Mutual understanding and compassion
• Trust in one another (able to express feelings - including in relation to the other's actions - without the fear of being judged); able to go to each other for emotional support
• Positive reciprocity - a relationship is based on equal give and take between the two parties.

Recently something happened on Facebook, and prompted me to think about what is it about "Facebook" and what is it about "Friends" to me?

I like to, through updates on Facebook (a very easily accessible tool in my life now), write about anything about my life, my thoughts, my feelings - whether good or bad, happy or sad, etc... anything if and when I want to.Well, that is real life isn't it? Life has many different facades, not all the time rosy. Anyway I am such a person that I like to express them out, cuz of my character. I don't like to keep inside me, cuz if I do, I will keep dwelling over it and it makes me feel crazy!

Well, a friend texted me and briefly asked me I am alright now, few days after the post on the Facebook. Then the friend, I believe its out of good intention, told me that some things are better not to be said in public. Inside me I feel like saying its NOYB! I do not sense the Sympathy and Empathy from you, even as a fellow mother yourself. Yes, probably you are more rational, less emotional in character, and very fortunately that you do not face such hostile issues from your child, and you may not have been rejected by your own child, or even if you did, you would have been so level-headed that you wouldn't mind it with a kid! Oh yah, maybe you also think I am an immature adult who do not know how to handle my own feelings well, and who actually mind it with a kiddo! But these are my feelings! I care so much because I put in a lot of efforts on my child and I feel terribly disheartened whenever my child rejects me, pushes me away in favor of her father. I am someone who is in need of recognition and acceptance. And Yes, I may not be good in managing my feelings, but trust me, I have kept more inside me over the years. I have learnt not to share so much of my real feelings over the years. But there are times when I am really emotional and down, I need an outlet to release my feelings.

After this incident, I wonder... what is considered a Friend? One who tells the truth they have of you despite knowing that may hurt? Or who should at least empathize even if they don't sympathize? Maybe that is why it is defined in such a way that "there is a range of degrees of intimacy in friendship..." Friends who understand you better, who support you yet not afraid to tell you the truth after they have shown their support and understanding for you, are of a closer relationship. Those who only briefly tried to show their concern, then turn around to give a quick harsh judgement and opinion of their own, OUCH! That hurts. That I afraid I have to stay away...because you never once tried to understand me...

Well, I have learnt my lesson since I have been judged and commented on, no matter how much I want to relay my feelings/thoughts into words on Facebook, I better think twice! No I better think thrice! I have to turn to my blog to vent all the unspoken thoughts and feelings...& of cuz to count on real Friends whom I can trust to confide to...even if they judge, they have empathized...
^[update]

Kayla's 2nd birthday Party + Zoo Outing

24 July 2011, Sunday: Organised a mini birthday party for Kayla with close family members to celebrate her 2nd birthday at our house.

Chosen "Winnie the Pooh & Friends" theme for her this year cuz its my favourite! haha... She likes them too lah.

The invitation cards and Party Favors

Party Deco and Cake from Pine Gardens

When we put up the party decorations on the night before, Kayla went "wow" and was excited about her birthday party. On that actual morning, she also remembered and said words like "birthday party", "happy birthday", "presents"!

Thankful it was a small and private gathering, Kayla had fun playing with her cousins and interacted with the close family members whom she is familiar with.

We had lotsa fun taking lotsa PHOTOS! Including Pooh's theme Polaroids (but Kayla got a bit irritated at the end cuz she had been called by us many times! No choice since she was the star of the day!)

"Happy Birthday to you... Happy Birthday to KAYLA!" sings the gang!

The lil' Yammies taking a group picture...

Her Presents from family and friends!

Handmade Cards from myself and my brother

Opening her Presents!

26 July 2011, Tuesday: We took a day's leave on Kayla's birthday to bring her out to the ZOO! She had only went once to the Zoo when she was younger, so I think she may not have remembered that trip. Now she knows more animals, so hopefully she will have a beneficial trip ! Also heard from friends that there is this Water Play area in the Zoo which kids really love playing there, and want to bring Kayla there to play too!

Hello Zoo!

Upon entering a few steps into the entrance, the lazy girl already asked to be carried and don't wish to walk. I tried to distract her attention and started introducing the animals to her so that she won't keep pestering us to carry her!

Gazing at the zebras..

Next stop is the Water Play area!

Initially she was hesitant when she stepped on the wet spongy floor, but started to let her guard down once she started playing with the water!

Splash! Splash! Splash!

Mama is also having fun with Kayla!
Kayla loves playing on the slide and asks for more!

After a bath & KFC lunch, let's continue the journey...


We shall revisit the Zoo soon! Bye Bye Zoo!

Hope Kayla had an enjoyable day out with us at the Zoo for her birthday!
Happy 2 years old, my dear girl!

Kayla turns 2 years old!

KAYLA IS 2 YEARS OLD NOW!! How time flies..from a dependent little baby to a big girl who starts to know what she wants, and displaying the "Terrible Two" tempers!

I shall first recap of her development during the 22-24months:

22-23 mths:

- Speaking in a more structured & complete 1-2 sentences.
- Knows how to use more adjectives to describe how she feels, or what she sees. Eg, Very hot.
- Using the term ＂你＂，＂我＂

23-24 mths:

Playtime!:
- Likes to engage in imaginary play with cooking & gets excited over an array of cooking toys!

- Likes to ask me to take one book to read while she takes another book to read aloud to herself at same time (another form of pretend play)
- Adding on to the list of songs that she knows to sing ("Happy Birthday" song, "泥娃娃", "Muffin Man", "Twinkle Twinkle Little stars" ), she can now sing "London Bridge is falling down", "Rain Rain Go Away", and chinese version of "Twinkle Twinkle Little stars", "Happy Birthday", 客人来.

Character development:
- Very structured & insistent in the way how she wants certain things to be done. For eg, she will want to keep the toys before leaving and even have to be at the original place they are (eg upper drawer vs lower drawer) or insisting that I pick up a bottle that has fallen down & put it back to original position.

Communication skills development:
- Able to initiate talking with us instead of just responding to our questions. Eg, she will tell us things like "Let's go!"
- Will start to notice whenever there is something attractive in the surroundings that caught her attention, then she would try to point out to us & ask " What's that?"
- Likes to ask " Why? Wad happen?"
- Sometimes even wanting us to follow what she says. Eg she would want us to say the Cantonese version of the word we used instead of English (this is under the influence of her grandpa!)

Her Firsts!:
- Tried Durians & French fries for the first time
Concept of colors, and speed:
- Starting to distinguish between red light & green light ( traffic lights)
- Able to distinguish between concepts of speed, and will always ask us to sing "fast" or "slow" tempo

Terrible Two's behaviors!:

- Behaviors such as pushing, beating start to happen more frequently. And even go around telling people that she has done it thou we have scolded or taught her that it's wrong to do that. Probably trying to seek attention? Not sure too...

- Lots of whining, tantrums throwing, incessantly crying... *ARGH!* So have started to set a 'naughty corner' for disciplining her!

My Wish

Birthday-Wish

Just passed my last 20th birthday 4 days back... Sigh... Once the years passed, its never turning back. I never thought my youthful 20s would pass so fast. I always thought, time is on my side. I always thought, I will always be this youthful. But, the reality is not like this.

Next year will be my first big "3". I have to learn to age with grace. I have to learn to embrace LIFE. I have to be grateful for every single year of my life as they are given by my parents and is cherishable!

What I am "fearful" about aging is the signs that will show on my face (e.g. wrinkles, spots, dull looking skin). Maybe can start to use SK II products and eat more bird's nest to nourish my skin and maintain my youth! Haha... Seriously, maybe I can focus more on the important elements of aging, for e.g. matured disposition, more wisdom, being a steady mother , being a more respectful person etc? Well, I shall work harder on focusing on that. But I still WISH I can maintain my youth!!! Hahaha...

Parent-Wish

I wish, as a parent, for my child to be able to explore freely in their world. I wish, as a parent, for my child to be able to grow up feeling confident, and brave. I wish, as a parent, for my child to have unlimited quest for knowledge. I wish, as a parent, for my child to be independent and strong. Unlike me.

I deem myself to be a failure, sometimes. I am conservative and unwilling to explore the world. I am timid and have no confidence in myself (can't even drive a car confidently despite earning myself a license!). I always need other people to give me recognition, and yet I do not give myself any. Maybe I have always been well-protected and pampered by my family so I have always been a da-xiao-jie. When I grew up, I had to learn the hard ways on adjusting to the reality of life. Say for example when I become a mother, I found it so hard coping... If I had been stronger, tougher, independent, or more confident of myself, I would have adjusted to my new role better.

So I hope I can encourage my girl to be more daring to explore, to imagine, to be curious. And I hope my partner can support me by understanding how I want to be as a parent, and encourage her more instead of inhibiting what she can do, what she cannot do. If not, this will be an endless struggle between us, and she may end up being pampered, & being not confident like me when she grows up...

We can never be there for our children. We can never be there holding their hands, or catching them when they fall. Failure, in fact, could be the most effective way to learn and gain experience. So the most critical thing during their learning stage is to encourage and train them lifetime skills & positive attributes, which will be valuable to them for their whole life.

Life-Wish

I have this wish in my life which I have yet to fulfill thou I don't know when it will materialise. My wish is to bring my parents (especially my mother) out on a holiday trip. This is a simple yet not that simple wish. As my mother is very tied up with a demanding and ailing grandmother in the house, she cannot even leave the house for too long. I can understand her situation. Yet at the same time, I wish I can bring her out to see the world, for she had only went to Malaysia ONCE for her honeymoon many many years ago.

Death-Wish

This sounds a bit depressing huh? I have no death thoughts. But thought of penning it down somewhere, in any case... Well, things are so unpredictable. Who knows what happens next?

Its been my wish, when at my funeral, my beloved family and friends to write me a personal note about myself. And shall read to me before I depart the world. I always like to know what does people think of me? Am I a good friend? Or am I a detestable person? Or what have I done/contributed to their lives when I was alive? Or whether we had wonderful and happy memories together? Or whether you will miss me when I am gone... Then burnt me the notes so that I will bring along with me to the other world...

Hubby, you reading this? I know you don't like to write letters/cards to me cuz you are not that sort of person. But I still hope you will let me know your heartfelt thoughts. I hope I had made a positive impact in your life, despite all the unhappy events that had happened.

These are my Wishes....